There are crocodiles there. There are crocodiles and hamadryas

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IN last days Spring begins the most difficult season for many media outlets, when there are few news feeds, but you need to fill the news feed with something. During this period, everyone gets out of the situation as best they can. The editors of TJournal paid attention to the trend of this May - crazy news about animals - and selected seven news stories that received considerable resonance on the Internet.

120kg woman fell on a crocodile

An accountant of the Soviet Circus fell on a two-meter crocodile Fedya while the troupe was moving in a minibus. The crocodile was lying on the floor of the bus, wrapped in a blanket, when the wheel hit a pothole in the road and the woman lost her seat. Both Fedya and the accountant escaped with fear.

In Kronstadt, a team of special purpose divers removed a kitten from a tree

Professional rescuers refused to remove the animal from the tree, after which LenVMB officers began rescuing it. They used a five-metre plank and "marine salvage equipment" and the entire operation took about 20 minutes.

The owner handed over to the police the cat who brought her a bag of cannabis

A New Zealand woman called the police after domestic cat Instead of a dead rat, he brought drugs to her doorstep. The bag contained approximately 5 grams of cannabis, which could fetch $100-$150 on the country's illegal market. A law enforcement official said that similar cases he had not encountered it yet, and sent the hemp for examination in order to identify the real owner.

In Orel, rescuers freed a dog stuck in an eagle

The dog got entangled in the branches from which the sculpture of the city symbol, installed at the Oryol station, is made. Following a call from an alert citizen who took pity on the animal, employees of the regional search and rescue service arrived at the scene and freed the dog in a few minutes.

In the Kaliningrad region, the biker dog Stitch had his motorcycle stolen

Unknown people stole a yellow BMW motorcycle belonging to a resident of Sovetsk in the Kaliningrad region. In addition to the stolen vehicle, the man owns a dog named Stitch, who has become a local Internet celebrity thanks to videos about trips with the owner and “biker” suits.

Pet cat Baz was left without an eye after being brutally beaten by unknown assailants. According to the owner of the animal, a resident of British Gloucester, the reason could be the unusual appearance of the cat, supposedly similar to Adolf Hitler due to the spot under the nose and the black “bangs” above the eyebrows. She emphasized that in reality her pet has a timid and gentle character. The cat's beating is being investigated by local police.

A lioness died in Yekaterinburg after being transported on a train like a cat.

The animal was removed from a passenger train Moscow - Novy Urengoy. According to documents, the 50-kilogram lioness was framed as a cat. On the way, she began to behave aggressively, and a veterinarian and trainer who arrived, accompanied by police, were forced to give her a tranquilizer injection. The lion cub was removed from the train in a box with air holes, and it was later discovered that the animal had suffocated.

By the summer of 2018, the first part of the new zoo will open in Kazan - “Zambezi River”. The work has already been completed by 75% - the finishing of the enclosures with artificial stone and wood is underway, as well as landscaping work inside the enclosures. They also began bringing animals to the city for the new zoo.

The zoo and botanical garden entered into agreements for the purchase of 10 species of animals for the Zambezi River, representatives of three of them have already arrived in Kazan. These are hamadryas, brazza monkeys and meerkats.

Soon, hyraxes, giraffes, pink flamingos, crowned cranes, crocodiles, turtles and the world's smallest antelope, dik-diks, will also arrive from nurseries in the USA, Africa and Australia. All other animals, including zebras, will arrive after the enclosures for them are built. In total, it is planned to import 232 individuals, representatives of 34 species.

Delivering animals to Russia from all over the world is not easy. For example, transporting elephants can be difficult, and this is not only due to their size. Elephants will be brought in at the age of 4-5 years; it is important that they grow up in the new zoo, in special cages,” the Kazan City Hall portal quotes the director of the city zoo, Fanis Nurmukhametov.

By the way, there are no African elephants in Russian zoos yet.

It will not be possible to see new animals right away. First, they are in quarantine for a month, after which adaptation begins, which takes about another month.

“OUR GOAL IS TO REMOVE ALL CELLS”

When constructing a zoo in Kazan, the designers looked at the experience of their European colleagues. They believe that it is necessary to create natural conditions for animals, to leave a piece of nature. For example, a perimeter fence should be made of wicker or logs, and an electric shepherd, mesh or deep ditch as an invisible “filling” to outsiders.

There are animals that do not need large fences at all. Giraffes, for example, cannot go beyond a barrier made of stones with a diameter of 40 centimeters. Our goal is to remove all cages and leave space so that there is no feeling that the animals are behind bars. The concept of past centuries is outdated. Due to our climate, we will still create indoor exhibition spaces where you can go even in winter and see elephants, giraffes, gorillas, chimpanzees, lions, and cheetahs. Shelters will also be created for the animals, where they will rest from visitors, shares the director of the zoo.

Animals will not be lonely in enclosures. For example, crocodiles, hyraxes and meerkats will live together with elephants. Antelopes will be placed with the giraffes, and there will also be a terrarium.

Builders, in consultation with zoo specialists and other experts, already at the stage of constructing new complexes take into account the “requirements” of animals. For example, utility networks are played out in such a way that the animals are not injured. Wires and pipes are covered with stones and artificial polymer concrete. An original solution was found for arranging an enclosure with gorillas: since they love warmth, a heated stone will be installed for them and placed closer to the visitors, and turning it with the “warm” side, says Fanis Nurmukhametov.

“ZAMBEZI RIVER” IS NOT THE LIMIT

"Zambezi River" is dedicated to Africa. After it is opened, they will begin to reconstruct the old part of the zoo. There main theme will be the nature of Russia. They will settle here brown bears, tigers, leopards, musk oxen, otters, songbirds, eagles, but at the forefront are polar bears; the most spectacular enclosure will be created for them.

After this there will be the construction of the third part on the theme of the nature of South America. Beetles, parrots, capybaras, and tapirs will live here. By preliminary plans « South America» will be located on the opposite shore of Lake Sredny Kaban along Tekhnicheskaya Street. A bridge will connect it with the current territory of the zoo.

After completing the first stage further reconstruction will go much faster, since on the territory of Russia, taking into account the climate, large warm rooms in enclosures. For example, the tiger and leopard do not need them, says the director of the zoo.

As a result, each part of the zoo will be 7 hectares. There are no zoos of this kind in Russia yet. By the way, after the expansion of the zoo and garden, its staff will also increase - from 110 people to 170.

Find out the latest news from Kazan and Tatarstan in our groups

A fisherman stands on the river bank and catches fish. A crocodile swims up to him and asks:
- Does it bite?
- No.
- Well, I should go for a swim...

pavelvk: I never wear a seat belt. My uncle flew through the windfall several times, with virtually no consequences. And the mice are to be written off... Morze: Uncle is a dummy? Mikky: :-))) “During the day, Gena worked as a crocodile at the zoo” © E. Uspensky

A giraffe, a crocodile and a hippopotamus were knocking on my door. All wearing black glasses. I open it. The giraffe takes off his glasses and says: “We have received information that you are taking hallucinogens. I still can’t understand whether someone told me this or...

The monkey sat on the river bank and concentratedly rinsed in the water.
banana peel. A passing crocodile looked at her for a long time and finally
asked:
- Tell me, what are you doing? I can't understand it at all.
- Give me a dollar, then I’ll tell you.
- Okay, just say it.
The monkey deftly hid the dollar and said:
- You see, I’m rinsing the banana peel.
- That's all?
- That's all.
- What a fool you are!
“Maybe she’s a fool, but she never left without thirty dollars.”

Two crocodiles go to bed. At night one of them suddenly
wakes up and says:
- Why did I do this?.. Such bad dream I dreamed about it.
Another one for him:
- Don’t eat intellectuals at night!..

A buyer comes to a pet store and asks: - Do you have crocodiles? - Eat. - Green? - Green. - Toothy? - Toothy. Buy one? - No, I’m afraid of them from here too!

Regarding the war in Iraq and the aggressive US policy:
"... the policy of appeasing the arrestor is akin to communicating with a crocodile in
hoping that he will eat you last."
W. Churchill

Carlson sits on the roof and cries.
Crocodile Gena comes up and asks:
-Why are you crying?
And Carlosson replies:
- Yes, the pants flew away, with the propeller.
Gena:
- Well, to hell with them.
Carloson:
-Well, what am I talking about!

Cheburashka was shown in Lithuania in the local dialect. It was called "Kulverstukas and Crocodiles Genas". The best moment - the crocodile Genas is looking for ""Kulverstukas"" in the dictionary: ""Chebureks... Cheboksary... But Kulverstukas is not there!""

A man sits on the banks of the Nile, fishing. It’s hot, stuffy, the fish aren’t biting. He sits for an hour, sits for two, sits for three - to no avail. A crocodile emerges from the water and asks sympathetically:
- What, is it hot?
- Yes....
- It’s stuffy, I guess?
- Yes...
- (with hope in his voice) So, maybe you can take a swim?

A man (C) comes to the director (D) of the circus.
C: I have a number...
D: I'm afraid we don't need you now, we've already got everything done new program, in six months, maybe...
C: Look, the number is unique.
D: It’s unlikely that this will change anything, but if you insist...
show your number.
C: Do you have a piano?
D: Of course, let's go.
In short, the man shows the director the number: he goes on stage
crocodile, parrot flies out, crocodile sits down at the piano,
plays, a parrot sits on a crocodile’s head and sings.
The director is shocked, the number is amazing, a wild success, lifelong
contract...
D: But now that we have signed a lifetime contract, explain
tell me how you achieved this. I don't believe that you don't have some
secret: crocodiles don't play the piano, parrots don't sing!
C: Well, now I can honestly and without fear admit: all my
The number is a complete phony. Parrot musically
absolutely mediocre, in fact, both the crocodile plays and sings.

The new Russian comes to the lads in a new fancy jeep. All the bros have gathered and are discussing an expensive purchase. The car, without words, is full of bells and whistles, in general, an airplane on wheels. One fits:
- Listen, why is your new tire tread somehow strange?
- Yes, this tire is made of crocodile skin. You don’t even need to spike it for the winter; in the cold it becomes covered with pimples on its own.

Among you girls, I feel like I’m in Africa! - What about Africa? - There are only crocodiles all around...

1938 A zookeeper stands in front of the open mouth of a fire
romical crocodile and looks inside.
- What's wrong with him? - asks the approaching visitor.
-- I don't know yet. The doctor hasn't shown up for about half an hour.

The Frog sits on the Hippopotamus's muzzle and complains to the Crocodile: “What a nasty day it is today!” It had been raining since morning and something heavy was stuck to my butt...

In a kindergarten, the teacher asks the children: “What is the most evil animal?” All the children shout: “Wolf, lion, cheetah,” and Vovochka says: “Krokolev, he has a crocodile’s head in front, and a lion’s head in the back.” The teacher asks: “But what about Is he pooping? - That's why he's so angry.

One new Russian bet with another that his bull would tear the other's dachshund... and lost. The dachshund stood with a contented look, chewing the remains of the boule and licking its lips. The owner of the murdered woman is in shock...
-....How much does it cost in kind??!!!
-20 grand bucks.
-Why is it so expensive???
-5 pieces are crocodile, and 15 are plastic surgery.

A tourist sends an SMS from an exotic tour:
“I have a normal rest: there are sharks in the sea, crocodiles on the shore, we sit in the trees. Everything would be fine, but monkeys really want sex.”

Two friends are talking: - I got a crocodile! - Wow! And the neighbors don’t swear? - Who’s going to swear there?

One man is lying on the beach, and the second is going for a swim. - Don’t go, there’s a crocodile there! - the man says in a thin voice. The second one climbs into the water, gets out, and lies down next to him. In a thin voice: - And, indeed, a crocodile. Another one is coming, two men: - Don’t go, there’s a crocodile there! The man crawls out of the water and silently lies down on the sand. Then a crocodile crawls onto the shore and asks in a thin voice: “Which of you was the last to swim?”